Thursday, May 22, 2014

Healthy Relationship With Your Body

This past week I stumbled upon my son’s self-consciousness about a physical feature he inherited and it broke my heart. While it hurt to see him concerned about it, it did give me the opportunity to talk to him about appearances. I shared how I was self-conscious about the space between my front teeth, and that as I go through life it still affects me at times. To deal with it, I remind myself that God made me who I am, and it’s okay to not be perfect. (I’m sure perfect people have issues too.) We talked about how people like him for his great personality and the person he is, not because of his appearance, even though he is very good-looking (not that I’m biased in this case). While he kept saying, “I know” to everything I said, I pray that this current self-consciousness will be short-lived and will not rear its ugly head too often in his life.

Grandma at 80
This experience got me thinking about our relationship with our appearance or our bodies. Whether we decide to do something about our appearance or not, if affects our emotional and mental state. We seem to never be consistently content about our looks. My Grandma was a beautiful woman, but she was always on one diet or another to lose those last five pounds. I used the ‘pregnancy excuse’ to eat as much as I wanted because it was “okay” to be “fat” during that time. I’ve known people who were obsessed with exercise and those who avoid it like the plague. Just for Men, hair removal, Botox, body sculpting, liposuction, plastic surgery, steroids. Look in magazines, online, billboards and commercials and you’ll see beautiful people with products and tips on how to get rid of or fix the parts of our appearance we do not like.

Have you seen the video of the model that is digitally enhanced to create the “perfect” person? Google ‘Photoshop perfect model video’ or watch this news link http://gma.yahoo.com/video/time-lapse-video-shows-models-122222286.html on body image. The organization Global Democracy was the first to post the video in hopes of getting a “mandatory disclaimer” on advertising if a model had her physical body manipulated by the computer. Many people may look negatively on marketers for doing this, but marketers sell what we want. Why is it that even though we know we don’t have perfect bodies, we think we should?

While marketing may influence what we believe about ourselves, we are our own worst critics. I know all the parts of my body that need “fixing,” and I know that some can be improved while others are hereditary and I need to stop letting them bother me. Herein lies the emotional and mental relationship I have with my body. I daily remind myself to care about being healthy and not compare myself to an ideal that is unrealistic. In keeping my body healthy, the things I eat and the things I do positively or negatively affect my body and in turn affect my emotional and mental state.

http://herrainbowbrightness.deviantart.com/
art/Sigarillas-Salad-118206314
We can have a loving or combative relationship with our bodies by the food we put into it. When I consume pasta and bread, ice cream and cookies, pop or alcohol on a regular basis, I gain weight. I like these foods, probably too much, and have learned to eat/drink them in moderation. I went through one summer eating big salads every day. (Remember Seinfeld’s Big Salad episode?) Great for my weight, but by the end of the summer, I couldn’t look a salad in the eye (if it had one). Once again, I had to learn moderation. Even though it’s easier to grab fast food or processed food, I know too much of it makes me feel awful, both physically and mentally.

Not eating affects our bodies as much as eating out of control. Anorexics and bulimics do not have healthy relationships with their bodies, nor do people who binge eat/drink. Many of these individuals also suffer from depression. While teens and early 20-somethings struggle most with eating disorders*, many take those tendencies into adulthood in the form of extreme dieting or skipping meals. My boys, while in this age group, do not seem to have these tendencies, but I want to watch for any changes in their eating behavior as they are on the early end of this age spectrum. I also want them to know about eating disorders in case they have girls or boys of their own that struggle with it.

In addition to eating right, exercise is a positive way to have a healthy relationship with our bodies. (I’m sure you’ve heard that before.) Sometimes I just don’t like to exercise. Breathing hard and sweating are agonizing for me on those days. But it is on those days that I consciously remind myself that my blood is pumping through my arteries and veins, keeping the pathways open and clear to keep me healthy. I may not enjoy the rest of the exercise, but at least I’ve convinced myself that it is for my benefit to complete it. Setting an example and teaching our children to exercise is important as they build their relationship with their bodies. The struggle comes in teaching exercise for health benefits rather than getting the six-pack, guns or ultra-slim figure as portrayed in the media.

The relationship we have with our bodies is an important part of our life. Without it, we die, literally. To live an emotionally and mentally stable life includes not being concerned about the plethora of messages out there touting what our bodies should look like and being more concerned about keeping it healthy. It’s not always an easy task, but what relationship that’s worth keeping is easy?


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