Today, I cried. I’m not embarrassed though because crying is
good for you (just Google benefits of crying). It wasn’t an angry cry or a
hopeless cry or a frustrated cry or a sobbing cry or even a grieving cry,
although I’ve had many of those over the years. If I had to categorize it, it
was a sad cry.
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| This boy turned 19 today. |
Our oldest turned 19 today. Every year, I write each of the
boys a letter for their birthday. This isn’t a letter that they open on their
birthday, but rather one that I tuck away for the future. The letter is a
summary of their past year…milestones, friends, sports, vacations, behaviors,
etc. I print it, put it in an envelope, and stick it in their “saving box,” the
place where we store keepsakes for them like report cards, writings, art work,
and awards. The boys know about the boxes and understand they will receive them
when they are “old enough,” which I’m anticipating is when they buy a house and
we deliver the boxes with the rest of their childhood “memorabilia.” I don’t
scrapbook so these letters are my way of keeping an account of their lives.
It was while I was writing his letter this morning that I
cried. As I thought of his first year of college and all that transpired, I was
overwhelmed with a mixture of sadness and pride. Sad that he is no longer
around all the time yet proud that he is growing into a responsible young adult.
He has handled adversity well and has learned some great life lessons this
year.
I’m quite the emotional person and have been known to cry
easily (to the embarrassment of our kids). I sobbed watching the movie “Up.” (More
than once.) Stories of individuals doing something special for others, like caring
for the homeless or the TV show Extreme Home Makeover, make me teary. When I
see other people cry, I cry. While water ekes out of my eyes in each of these
situations, none refresh my soul like a good alone cry. It’s during those times
that I reflect, talk to God, and let the tears freely flow. After all, every
one of those tears is washing away stress hormones from my body. What’s not good
about that?
I know men tend not to cry as often as women, but I hope as
our boys become men, they will experience the release that occurs when they
allow themselves to cry. Whether they cry alone, with a significant other, or
in a room full of people, I hope they find comfort through the tears, just like
their mom does.
